Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Finding Your Way To Talking About Drugs Sex And Booze In Your Parent Teenager Relationship

By Paul G Saver


Drugs, alcohol and sex are topics that many parents find difficult to discuss in their parent teenager relationships. As daunting as it may appear, to be a responsible parent you must be able to find a way to engage your teenager on these topics. Avoidance of such discussions may cause your teenager to resort to other sources of information that could result in them traveling down the road of self destruction.

It seems to be a self evident truth that when a human being is lacking of knowledge, skills or experience, they will inevitably resort to their understanding or experience when they were growing up.

Consider the parent of a teenager who feels pushed to their limits. It is understandable that they may very well end up shouting, name calling, threatening and using other forms of emotional abuse on their teenager. They may even get physical. It is not uncommon for such parents to be playing out the same script given to them by their own parents. Other options may not even enter their minds.

In a similar fashion, if your teenage experience was such that your parents never openly discussed things like alcohol, sex and drugs with you, you may feel also inclined to veer away from such topics. You might reason that: "Since I got by without my parents talking about such things, then so can my kids".

The truth be told, in the name of responsible parenting, it is inexcusable to avoid the hard topics with your kids because your parents never broached these issues with you. It is your job to break the inter generational cycle of ignorance by getting informed and taking action. That way you can pass on a new legacy of pro active parenting.

Through research and life experience I want to share with you, a three step process to effectively dialogue with your teenager about issues such as drugs, alcohol and sex. Your parent teenager relationship will benefit. Each step however, does require a little homework on your part.

Step #1. Know Your Values And How They Affect Your Views On Alcohol, Sex And Drugs.

The benefit of this step lies not in just merely clarifying what you believe but moreover in moderating or even changing your viewpoint based on new understanding.

Step #2. Educate Yourself About Drugs, Sex and Alcohol In The Context Of Young People's Lives.

Make the effort to do your own research. Distinguish between the facts and opinions. If you adhere to a certain religion, ask what your religion has to say about the tough topics. Get used to the language of your teenager when they talk about drugs, alcohol and sex.

Step #3. Make Time To Talk With Your Teenager.

Based on your ongoing research of the hard topics, with added confidence, decide to then communicate at least weekly with your teenager. If you stumble along the way, dust yourself off and try again and again.

If you commit to this path, congratulations because you are probably in the category of an elite parent. Your perseverance in this endeavor will take your parent teenager relationship to new heights helping to establish a strong foundation for the happiness and success of your teenager.




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