In terms of developing your parent teenager relationship, have you given much thought to what it is that you are trying to achieve? Or are you a parent that just seeks to take on each day as it comes and just do the best you can? If this looks like you, my guess is that you spend most of your time dealing with problems as they arise and seeking to accomplish some short term goals. Long term goals such as developing character in your teenager probably just sounds good in theory.
When I enquire of parents of teenagers about their parenting goals, the most typical response I get goes something like: "I just want my child to be successful and happy". This is all well and good but somewhat vague. Upon deeper introspection I often hear parents conclude with statements like: "I just want him to grow up and become a responsible adult". Words such as "growth" and "responsibility" in a parents language point toward raising a child to become a person of healthy character.
Let's get down to the nuts and bolts.
Growth has both an internal and external dimension since every human being consists of body and spirit. Growth of the physical body is a given and easily defined. Growth of the human spirit is often overlooked and usually hard to define.
The term "responsibility" comprises two words: "response" and "ability". Being responsible means to do what is right, whatever the situation. The practise of doing what is right over and over again, naturally results in the development of a healthy character.
How then is human character defined? The character of human being refers to his intrinsic quality. It refers to his values, how he relates to others, his capacity to problem solve, how he deals with such things as failure and his capacity to empathise with the feelings of another. Moreover, character speaks of a person's capacity to love and be loved.
It follows then that your teenager's capacity to act responsibly, to experience happiness and be successful is proportional to the quality of their character.
If your teenager possesses inner strength they usually succeed even in spite of tough circumstances.
If a human relationship calls for a certain level of forgiveness and understanding, but these qaulities are deficient, the relationship will flounder.
If a challenging period in your teen's life requires the ability to exercise delayed self gratification and patience, but these qualities are deficient, they will flounder.
Character is so important. By nurturing good character through your parent teenager relationship you are taking direct action to help enable your teen to succeed. Good character is conduicive to taking responsibility, being happy and successful. Character is destiny.
When I enquire of parents of teenagers about their parenting goals, the most typical response I get goes something like: "I just want my child to be successful and happy". This is all well and good but somewhat vague. Upon deeper introspection I often hear parents conclude with statements like: "I just want him to grow up and become a responsible adult". Words such as "growth" and "responsibility" in a parents language point toward raising a child to become a person of healthy character.
Let's get down to the nuts and bolts.
Growth has both an internal and external dimension since every human being consists of body and spirit. Growth of the physical body is a given and easily defined. Growth of the human spirit is often overlooked and usually hard to define.
The term "responsibility" comprises two words: "response" and "ability". Being responsible means to do what is right, whatever the situation. The practise of doing what is right over and over again, naturally results in the development of a healthy character.
How then is human character defined? The character of human being refers to his intrinsic quality. It refers to his values, how he relates to others, his capacity to problem solve, how he deals with such things as failure and his capacity to empathise with the feelings of another. Moreover, character speaks of a person's capacity to love and be loved.
It follows then that your teenager's capacity to act responsibly, to experience happiness and be successful is proportional to the quality of their character.
If your teenager possesses inner strength they usually succeed even in spite of tough circumstances.
If a human relationship calls for a certain level of forgiveness and understanding, but these qaulities are deficient, the relationship will flounder.
If a challenging period in your teen's life requires the ability to exercise delayed self gratification and patience, but these qualities are deficient, they will flounder.
Character is so important. By nurturing good character through your parent teenager relationship you are taking direct action to help enable your teen to succeed. Good character is conduicive to taking responsibility, being happy and successful. Character is destiny.
About the Author:
Do you undergo more pain andmisery rather than delight and happiness in your parent teenager relationship ? If so, before you decide to die in despair, check out parenting expert, Paul Saver's seven FREE videos. Each video is carefully crafted to transform your relationship. Just click on the link above.
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