How much do you really value your parent teenager relationship? If on a scale of 1-10, where 1 represents "not at all" and 10 represents "there is nothing more important", unless your answer is a 9 or a 10, don't bother reading any further.
The truth of the matter is that whilst many parents complain about how stressed and worried they are about the selfish, irresponsible and immature behavior of their teenager, they fail to commit to doing what it takes to make a difference in their parent teenager relationship.
Let's begin with a sobering reality check. Your teen is not there to meet your needs. They are not an accessory. They are God's gift to you. An incredibly precious life. A living being who feels, has desires and has unlimited potential. Your teenager is not a thing that you can place on a shelf in your home or rearrange in your life around other pressing priorities.
If you say to your teenager that you are too pressed for time to attend a school function or to meet their friends, how might they come to see themselves? Not that important. If this is the reality, how then may they come to see their parent teenager relationship? Not that important.
If your teenager notices that their parents are being busy doing lots of things and that the actual quality time they spend with their parent is infrequent and interrupted with all the other stuff, they may very well conclude that they have to join the queue for Mum and Dad's attention.
If this is the sad truth with your teenager is it surprising when your teenager comes to prefer to relate to their friends and comes to devalue their parent teenager relationship?
It is a sobering fact that there are too many teenagers who have already ejected their parents from their quality world.
The old adage that "children should be seen but not heard" has gone a stage further to become, "children need not be seen".
Life in today's modern world that too often devalues core values such as responsibility, chastity, fidelity, commitment, self discipline and the like, where the family unity becomes the loser, one questions "where the hell are we headed?"
To get to the point. If you currently are the parent of a teenager who has already ejected you from their quality world or they are on the verge of doing so, and your parent teenager relationship sucks, and it bothers you, here is what YOU need to do, starting today.
Position yourself in your family so that you can no longer hide behind a job, the need to upgrade your home, or visit exotic destinations on the planet, or the need to prepare the money for your teenagers university education. What this means is that in the name of salvaging your parent teenager relationship and therefore giving your teenager the priority that they deserve, change your life.
This might mean taking a pay cut. Quitting your second job. Living in a poorer house. Going camping on your vacations rather than overseas. Doing with one car. Whatever it takes to show your teenager that you are making a choice to be there for him or her. In so doing you are saying that the parent teenager relationship is more important than all the other stuff.
Next become a passionate student of parenting. Don't just rely on how you were raised to know how to be the best parent. Read books, take courses, talk to parents that seem to have have their parenting act together. Again whatever it takes. Above all, tell your teenager, through your actions, that you treasure your parent teenager relationship and that the most important things in life are not things.
The truth of the matter is that whilst many parents complain about how stressed and worried they are about the selfish, irresponsible and immature behavior of their teenager, they fail to commit to doing what it takes to make a difference in their parent teenager relationship.
Let's begin with a sobering reality check. Your teen is not there to meet your needs. They are not an accessory. They are God's gift to you. An incredibly precious life. A living being who feels, has desires and has unlimited potential. Your teenager is not a thing that you can place on a shelf in your home or rearrange in your life around other pressing priorities.
If you say to your teenager that you are too pressed for time to attend a school function or to meet their friends, how might they come to see themselves? Not that important. If this is the reality, how then may they come to see their parent teenager relationship? Not that important.
If your teenager notices that their parents are being busy doing lots of things and that the actual quality time they spend with their parent is infrequent and interrupted with all the other stuff, they may very well conclude that they have to join the queue for Mum and Dad's attention.
If this is the sad truth with your teenager is it surprising when your teenager comes to prefer to relate to their friends and comes to devalue their parent teenager relationship?
It is a sobering fact that there are too many teenagers who have already ejected their parents from their quality world.
The old adage that "children should be seen but not heard" has gone a stage further to become, "children need not be seen".
Life in today's modern world that too often devalues core values such as responsibility, chastity, fidelity, commitment, self discipline and the like, where the family unity becomes the loser, one questions "where the hell are we headed?"
To get to the point. If you currently are the parent of a teenager who has already ejected you from their quality world or they are on the verge of doing so, and your parent teenager relationship sucks, and it bothers you, here is what YOU need to do, starting today.
Position yourself in your family so that you can no longer hide behind a job, the need to upgrade your home, or visit exotic destinations on the planet, or the need to prepare the money for your teenagers university education. What this means is that in the name of salvaging your parent teenager relationship and therefore giving your teenager the priority that they deserve, change your life.
This might mean taking a pay cut. Quitting your second job. Living in a poorer house. Going camping on your vacations rather than overseas. Doing with one car. Whatever it takes to show your teenager that you are making a choice to be there for him or her. In so doing you are saying that the parent teenager relationship is more important than all the other stuff.
Next become a passionate student of parenting. Don't just rely on how you were raised to know how to be the best parent. Read books, take courses, talk to parents that seem to have have their parenting act together. Again whatever it takes. Above all, tell your teenager, through your actions, that you treasure your parent teenager relationship and that the most important things in life are not things.
About the Author:
Are you frustrated and overwhelmed dealing with your teen? Do you feel like that you don't even know them anymore? Are you at your wits end as to what to do? If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, before you do anything else, check out parenting expert, Paul Saver's 7 FREE videos. Each video goes for less than five minutes but are power packed with content to upgrade your parent teen relationship .
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